How are you feeling?....

I keep going back and reading this post wondering what to add to make it less sad but I can't!  So before you read on.... know this....

Here's my disclaimer....

While these awful conditions are a huge part of my life...they are not my life.  There are times though that I wish I could scream out how much this all sucks sometimes.   Being that I was raised a lady...I don't.   But that doesn't mean I don't think it and doesn't mean I can't put it in my blog because my blog is to talk about these conditions...and it's not always happy.    

 

DEmotivators...I love these. 

How are you feeling?....

I dread this question.  D R E A D it!

Every time someone asks me this there is an inner monolog in my head saying

.....do I tell the truth?
I feel like crap today...my head feels like a 20 pound bowling ball and I would give anything to just go rest it on something so I don't have to hold the darn thing up anymore.

OR

.....do I lie?
 I feel great! :) ........It's easier and honestly are they really interested in knowing how utterly crappy I feel....? probably not.  Does it make everyone happier and less stressed when I say I feel fine? 

Absolutely....

Am I a good lair?  Nope... I don't think I fool anyone when I lie...but sometimes I do anyway. 

Do I still want people to ask?

yes.  

But only if you are truly interested because  I just may decide to tell the truth...and there are days that I want nothing more than to tell someone how I feel about all this....it's not something many would want to hear and it's something even fewer would be able to understand.  

But it would be awfully therapeutic to scream how much Chiari and Basilar invagination sucks just once....

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Not really Chiari related but....

I guess this could somehow relate to Chiari but its a stretch :)

The relationship to Chiari would probably be life goes on and so do I.   Some days suck....others I feel perfectly normal.   Everyday I wonder what's coming..but life does go on.  

I loved this quote and am seriously thinking of getting the last part tattooed on me just in case I forget.

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da life goes on.... 
 (a Beatles reference for those scratching their heads)

Speaking of living....
We went to  Disney in May and had a blast.   I did not have one headache the whole time!  I was scared that I would have a bad day or many bad days but nope..no bad days..none, zilch, nada!

....it was awesome and I felt normal.

Making memories!

...great ones that we will remember forever. 

Disney was great and I have never felt so much like a kid than I did sitting at the base of Cinderella's castle during the fireworks....not even when I was a kid.  Absolutely amazing! 

There are moments that you thank God for.... being with my family during that fireworks show was one of them.... 

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